My Dearest Zachary,

Where has the time gone?  I remember the moment you were placed in my arms and when I looked at your sweet face, I wondered what the world would hold for you.  I wondered how kind people would be towards you.  I wondered why type of a person I must have been to be blessed with a son like you.  While I knew we had a long road ahead of us, I never knew how long and difficult this road was going to be for you.

First, as you’re starting the fifth grade, you amaze me.  Your intelligence and wit are absolutely incredible.  Your love for Star Wars is really like nothing I’ve ever seen and your knowledge for details and facts is amazing.  You are so much fun.  You are also sensitive and loving, which makes being your mom a pleasure.

I’ve watched how you’ve handled all of your trials with such determination and faith.  You have always held to the knowledge that the Lord loves you and will help you through each one of your surgeries.  Even as we are approaching surgery no. 4 for the same exact procedure, you are still determined to make your life better and you hold onto the faith that this surgery will be successful.

Simply put: you are my hero Zachary.  In spite of everythingt, you can still laugh, still make me smile, and you are still concerned about others around you.  When faced with diversity, your compassion and love for others is indescribable.  I have been so blessed to be your mother and have learned so much from you.  Most importantly, I have learned that through all of life’s trials the greatest thing we can do is laugh and serve those around us.

Zachary you have the most infectious laugh.  I love hearing you and Faith laugh, I love hearing you laugh with your dad as you’re trying to tell him a story.  I love that in spite of everything, you can still find good in the world around you.  You make me smile.

With this being your 18th surgery, it still feels like the first one.  I hope you know that I would willing to trade places with you so that I could have the surgery and pain, instead of you.  The hardest thing I’ve ever had to do is watch you suffer.  I know that your dad feels exactly the same way I do about all of this.  He has said repeatedly “Why Zachary?”

Through everything, you are still my little boy.  I love you more than all the stars in the galaxy.  Like you say before every surgery “May the Force be With You”.

Love you always,

Mom 20170814_103317